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about
happy birthday tess
five years gone
always missed always
xoxo
lyrics
Didn’t have the words to use
Maybe ‘cause we hardly spoke
I rattled off in ancient tongues
You leaned and listened as I drove
You’d keep your dog out of the house
Whenever I came wilding ‘round
Maybe ‘cause to hold me close
You’d have to hold me to the ground
I didn’t know if the love you bestowed on me
Was real or somehow make believe
I didn’t know that when I said I had to go
You really were the one who had to leave
But you didn’t have to leave
You didn’t have to leave
You barely ever touched your plate
In that rapper’s hometown spot
I snapped a photo anyway
Your hands in prayer in front the cross
You used to bring me homemade meals
In mason jars near every day
And as my wits came back to me
I foolishly pushed you away
I didn’t know if the love you bestowed on me
Was real or somehow make believe
I didn’t know that when I said I had to go
You really were the one who had to leave
But you didn’t have to leave
You didn’t have to leave
These days I’m kept late like a fool
The tortured thoughts crowding my mind
That if our paths had never crossed
Somehow you’d still be alive
That if I never sought you out
Never held you in my arms
Then maybe God would have seen fit
To never let you see such harm
I didn’t know if the love you bestowed on me
Was real or somehow make believe
I didn’t know that when I said I had to go
You really were the one who had to leave
But you didn’t have to leave
You didn’t have to leave
credits
released November 30, 2022
produced and engineered by Jef Harrison at Era Sun Sound
mastered by Laura DeRocchis
vocals, acoustic, and baby grand: Ivan Rivers
guitar and ocean swells: "Heavenly" Devin Staple
accompanying vocals: Kara Lea Manovich
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